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the donor conception rabbit hole. to be honest, I the donor conception rabbit hole. to be honest, I rarely thought about how our donor - our children's biological father - would play a part in our lives. we always knew we would love to meet him and intentionally chose an open ID donor so that our children could potentially connect when they turned 18. there was talk of siblings but I was too scared to open that door. these individuals were connected to my children in a way that I never would be - since they genetically are not mine. but something shifted this year and we did find out about 8 (soon to be 9) other siblings. we compared features and personality traits of the kids and we have gotten close with one of the families (who unfortunately doesn't live close by!). but that's where it ended. until a week and a half ago. one post on my social media changed my entire world. my entire perspective on the other half of my children's genes. a post that brought me a lot of pain, confusion, self-discovery and ultimately, freedom. yesterday, I had the honor of interviewing @lindsayeliseblount - a DCP (donor conceived person) - on @connectingrainbowsorg as we each shared our stories and experiences being donor conceived and using a donor. our hope was to bring our two communities together to work together instead of against each other. you see, there has been a great divide between RPs (recipient parent) and DCP. but it's time to close that gap. I have learned that the DCP who are speaking out are advocating for MY children. for our generation of kids. not for themselves - they are already grown up. they are selflessly trying to make the industry and the world a better place for the new generation of donor conceived individuals. they don't want history to repeat itself. cont in comments
oh, the places you’ll go our sweet, silly + ene oh, the places you’ll go our sweet, silly + energetic boy. you have blossomed this year. you have become the best big brother and further deepened your love of animals. we cannot wait to see who you become and will be there every step of the way. swipe for first day pics throughout the years 🥰😭 what do you think Parker wants to be when he grows up? 1. an “elf” (toy maker) 2. a veterinarian 3. a daddy 4. all of the above 😉 . . . . . . #preschoollife #lastfirstday #rivf #ivfsuccess #firstdayofschool #sweetboy #mommysboy #blondie
and that’s a wrap of Salt Water Jaffes 2021 🌊 and that’s a wrap of Salt Water Jaffes 2021 🌊 . . . . . . #seacolony #bethanybeach #ivfsuccess #rivf #reciprocalivf #sunkissed #beachphotoshoot #summerlovin #twomoms #femmelesbian #lesbianmom #queerparenting
i learned a very big lesson this weekend. and publ i learned a very big lesson this weekend. and publicly. for years, i have said that a donor is not a parent. and while it’s true that they are typically not a “social parent”, i have now learned from many donor conceived people (DCP) that they do indeed refer to the donor as a biological mother / father. they do feel a pull to know that side of their genetic tree (not all, but most). my original post on @connectingrainbowsorg about this had DCP coming at me (it felt like it) and i felt defensive. i was depressed and emotional all day on saturday. but a few kind and selfless souls (DCP) reached out to me individually and it has been eye opening. those DCP who are speaking up and speaking out are actually doing so to help OUR children. to help us recipient parents (RP) to not make the same mistakes they felt their parents made. to share in their experience as donor conceived individuals as we cannot relate to their experience. so ego aside, i listened. and reflected. there is work to be done. but i am doing it for my kids bc this is about them. this is going to be a long journey. and i hope you will join me. i plan to interview a bunch of DCP to hear from their experiences as they GUIDE US - yes, we have a lot to learn from them. follow @connectingrainbowsorg for these stories. tag a friend who could benefit. this is in no way telling anyone what they SHOULD do as this is a very personal decision. but i believe it’s important to listen to the voices of DCP as they didn’t have this opportunity when they were kids. i always like to keep it real and honest. this def has been emotional but i am feeling hopeful. . . . . . . . #twomoms #twodads #donorsperm #donorconception #donorconceived #equallove #queerparenting #samesexparents #rainbowfamily
“i feel sorry for your kids” when i typically “i feel sorry for your kids” when i typically get hateful comments, i ignore, delete and / or block the person without feeling much. a little eye roll and i move along. but when it involves my kids, it’s another story and crosses a line. yes, i choose to be public but it still baffles me how horrible people can really be behind a screen. my children were WANTED. i didn’t go get knocked up accidentally in a bar (no hate if that happened to you). thousands of needles, fifty thousand dollars, countless appointments to the fertility clinic. and let’s not mention have big to go through the adoption process to ensure both my wife and I have equal legal parental rights. we fought for them. we ADORE them. so actually, sir, i feel sorry for you. sorry that you didn’t receive enough love and attention as a child. sorry that you were raised to believe that anyone different than you is less than. sorry that you are raising a child who is going to continue to spread hate and bring the world down. but my kids? they will change the world for the better. they will love ALL. they will feel safe and secure and loved exactly as they are for who they are and whoever they turn out to be. so i am sending you peaceful vibes. may they help to heal the hurt you have experienced.

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© [year] GENAVIEVE SHINGLE LLC
WEBSITE BY FELICITY & DESIGN INC.