one common question I get asked is how we were able to afford our fertility journey. I’ll be very transparent with numbers and it’s insane to me how much we had to spend (but worth every single penny).  to have our two babies, it cost us about $50,000.  and it was all out of pocket.

our biggest initial cost was the sperm.  we had originally planned to do IUI where we would each carry one baby.  we wanted to make sure we had enough sperm so that both of our kids would have the same donor, so we purchased 8 vials (thinking we would then each get 4 tries).  back in 2015, 1 IUI vial was about $875 but they had a special where if you bought a certain amount, you got 2 free (or something like that) plus 2 years of free storage, so we snagged that (bargain sperm LOL)!  I think we spent about $5,000.  we went with Fairfax Cryobank and loved them (you can use code JAFFEFAM to get Full Unlimited Donor Access Plan for 90 days for FREE [$130 value] – code ends 12/31/2020).

keeping on the sperm front (never did I ever think I’d be talking about sperm)  – every time you have a procedure, you have to pay to have it shipped overnight and that was $325.  you also have to pay a storage fee for the sperm you purchase if you keep some of the vials at the cryobank – you can pay monthly or annually and I believe it’s about $40 / month.  one thing I loved about Fairfax was that you could sell back sperm you didn’t use so long as you store it with them.  they offer you 50% of what you paid.

now onto the initial testing.  when you go to a fertility clinic, they treat you as though there is a fertility issue, so you go through a lot of testing.  some may think it’s overkill, but for us, we wanted the best chance of having a baby and having a baby quickly.  fortunately, all of our blood work and ultrasounds were covered by insurance, but there was a $50 copay each visit (and you go a lot).  we also had to have genetic screening done at an outside lab, see a genetic counselor and a therapist (who did not take insurance).  

as our process moved along, our plans changed to Reciprocal IVF (see our full journey HERE).  we had to have an IVF consult to map out a plan and that was $325.  lots of meds were ordered for both me and Jordana.  my meds were to get my uterus ready and Jordana’s were to stimulate her ovaries for an egg retrieval.  my meds were mostly covered by insurance, so we spent a few hundred dollars but the stim meds weren’t covered and they were about $5,000.  {don’t worry, I’m going to share some resources on funding as well as cheaper fertility clinics I’ve found!}

and now the big one.  we had to pay in full prior to our egg retrieval and transfer … the egg retrieval was almost $11,000 and the transfer was almost $3,000.  I have to say, I was floored when I saw this.  how we paid for this was by using our savings for our house – at the time, we were renting. we were SO fortunately + blessed that Parker was our very first transfer.

additional costs: storing our remaining embryos is $800 / year.  then onto baby 2.  we decided to use our remaining embryos and so that transfer was almost $3,000 – it didn’t take and the other embryo didn’t survive the thaw.  we went through 3 IUIs – insurance covered but had small copays and meds (without insurance, I believe it was about $1000 for each IUI).  then back to RIVF which meant another egg retrieval + transfer + the stim meds.  this time, we were soooooo lucky that we connected with another lesbian couple on Instagram who gave us their leftover stim meds, so it cut our cost down a few thousand dollars!

so here you have it – things to prepare for if you use a fertility clinic as opposed to home insemination:

  • sperm
  • sperm storage
  • sperm shipment
  • bloodwork + ultrasounds
  • outside bloodwork (genetic screening)
  • therapist
  • IUIs
  • stim meds
  • gestational carrier meds
  • egg retrieval
  • embryo transfer
  • embryo storage
  • also plan on adopting your kiddos to make sure you’re both legal parents as a birth certificate does not grant legal parental rights (see my blog post HERE on that topic)



  • Future Family offers financing for fertility treatments with flexible monthly costs to cover the cost of IVF and egg freezing.  they work with fertility clinics nationwide to provide you with complete care.  another cool perk is that every plan comes with a Fertility Coach who is a registered nurse to answer any and all questions during your treatment.
  • Shady Grove Fertility (now offering virtual consults) is the largest fertility center in the national with 38 locations on the east coast.  I have friends who used them as they provide a bunch of financing options to help all types of families afford their care.  They also offer something called the Shared Risk 100% Refund Program where you bring home a baby or get 100% of your deposit back! They also offer military discounts.
  • CCRM – from what I’ve learned and heard from others – one of the top scientific fertility clinics. They have cutting edge labs + technology all under one roof so that you can move more quickly through the process (vs sending things to outside labs). They also offer 25% off if you are planning fertility preservation prior to any cancer treatments (how amazing is that?).  They also offer military discounts (thank you for your service!). They also offer different types of refund programs for IVF should you remain unsuccessful.
  • Our Clinic – Sincera Reproductive (you may even spot a family pic of us on the site!) – with 8 locations in PA, we obviously can’t speak highly enough of the care we received.  If you live in the local area and have any questions – please feel free to reach out via email or on IG.